10. No mechanical boots needed for our guy. Irondude flies by suspending reality. That’s right! he commands the forces of nature and bends them to his will. This also explains his inverted rectum trick.
9. Irondude’s name has nothing to do with a suit of armor; his nickname was given to him by six 19 year old French prostitutes when he was only a boy of fourteen.
8. Who needs billions of dollars when you can karaoke like an angle?
7. He can lift 45 pounds over his head. Irondude can and will prove this feat on any occasion someone is willing to pay $5.00 or when he is drunk, which leads to reason six.
6. Irondude cannot get drunk unless he pounds back an entire box of Gallo’s blackberry merlot, which he will only do on Tuesday mornings or while constipated. Both of these seem to occur on Tuesday.
5. He will not eat at McDonalds.
4. Women and men love Irondude. If you also would like to love Irondude for a nominal fee, you may contact him directly at irondude@herospy.com
3. Irondude drives a very small, junky, car to compensate for his gigantic penis.
2. Comic book publishers and Hollywood movie executives avoid telling Irondude’s story because he is too real, they can’t handle the truth or the uncompromising heat of “Irondude”!
1. I have two words for you “Albino Midgets”, enough said.
45 pounds? I WISH!! Thanks for the great post.